Spacewater.US

Last night, 1 AM

Techie Boyfriend: Does it ever bother you that we have no fridge magnets?
Sleepy INTERN: Sometimes, I guess.
Techie Boyfriend: It bothers me in the extreme. We keep putting it off. We’re never going to get fridge magnets unless we do it right now. Let’s go.
Sleepy INTERN: But it’s 1 AM!
Techie Boyfriend: Perfect. Walgreens is open until 2.

This morning, 9:30 AM

Very sleepy INTERN: (struggles under weight of 41 memoir proposals) Why are we getting so many of these right now?
Editorial Assistant: It’s August.
V. s. I: So?
Editorial Assistant: Think back nine months.
V. s. I: Mmm…December? What happens in December?
Editorial Assistant: People start writing memoirs in December. It takes them about nine months to finish. Then we start getting proposals in August.
V. s. I: They don’t REVISE?!?!?
Editorial Assistant: (calls over her shoulder to Assistant Editor) Isn’t she cute?

This morning, 10:30 AM

Very very sleepy INTERN: (going to water cooler to fill mug) …
Head Ed: You look tired.
V.v.s.I: I was up all night selecting and arranging fridg—um, insomnia.
Head Ed: You know what you should do?
Vvvs I: …
Head Ed: (pulls flier off desk) Ekstatik dancing. You’re probably suppressing one of your rhythms. Tonight at 8. Do it.
Vvvvs I: (*how about some ekstatik napping on that red couch?*) Wow. That sounds splendid.
Head Ed: We did a book about it a few years ago.

Coming soon: 7 Days of Fiction Boondogglery. INTERN has been suppressing the urge for too long.

They plan to keep redirecting existing tr.im URLs through the end of the year, but after that, they’re all dead. And people ask me why I wrote my own URL shortener for DF’s Twitter account.

“I don’t like composers who think. It gets in the way of their plagiarism.”

Don’t let the hippies hear that wood may make a better artificial bone than titanium. We’ll never live it down.

Italian scientists have developed a new “wood-derived bone substitute” that promises to be better than ceramic or metal implants. They start with a block of wood like red oak, burn it until the block is essentially charcoal and then coat the substance with calcium.

The “bone” takes about a week to produce at a cost of around $850. And while it’s not quite as cool as titanium, the spongier structure handles natural impact better, and other bones prefer the calcium carbon mix to space shuttle alloys.

So much for my awesome robot legs. [Discovery]