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10 Gadgets That Make Nerds Comfortable On a Beach [Tgif]

In most cases, a nerd standing on a beach is like the Queen of England standing on stage at a strip club. It just isn’t right. However, these 10 gadgets can make you feel more at home.

I don't think I need to explain the merits of a drivable beer cooler to anyone—much less nerds used to a sedentary lifestyle. The Cruzin' Cooler can hit speeds of 15mph with a payload of 24 12oz cans on board. [Cruzin' Cooler and 19th Hole Carts via Link]
The Grinch Winch features a tow rope and a 7HP engine that will hurl you head on into the surf. [Distortionboarding via Link]
I would hope that you are smart enough to generously apply SPF 50 sunscreen to that pasty body of yours, but you still might need a backup to prevent overexposure to the sun. The Minox Suntimer monitors UV rays and sounds an alarm when it thinks you’ve had enough. [Optix Planet and Link]
For the gadget fanatic, it’s not enough to merely admire the underwater landscape, it must be recorded. Thanko’s underwater video camera (25fps QVGA) is small enough to mount on a pair of goggles. [Link]
Of course you brought your laptop to the beach. As sad as that is, the LapDome was tailor made for people like you. Basically, it’s a mini tent for your laptop that protects it from the elements while shielding the screen from from that unfamiliar fiery orb in the sky. [LapDome via Link]
When a simple beach chair just won’t do, the Astone inflatable massage chair will provide a more luxurious solution. In addition to the vibrating massage pads, the chair also features a dock for your iPod, speakers and a handy remote control. [Axpertz via Link]
In keeping with your nerdy sensibilities, this unique surfboard was designed by Thomas Meyerhoffer—a guy that spent time working at Apple and was a driving force behind the design of Chumby. [Myerhoffer via Link]
If you are going to be out in the sun, you are going to need a pair of sunglasses. This Calvin Klein model look a bit Blues Brothers, but it does feature 4GB of storage. [Link]
It’s a shark! It’s a submarine! No, it’s some fat guy wearing a Superman wetsuit. If you can imagine it, the guys at Wetwear Custom Wetsuits can make it. [Wetwear]
When you are a guy and you have a set of man jugs like this, do us all a favor and wear a man bra with a t-shirt over it. [Link]

Joss Whedon On The Dark Secret At The Heart Of His Worlds [Exclusive]

How much darker can Dollhouse get, now that we’ve glimpsed the end of everything? Just how far will Joss Whedon go to explore the themes of searching for identity against impossible odds? We asked Whedon. His answers may shock you.

I’m not going to transcribe the entire interview, but I’ll summarize it in case the video is hard to listen to. (We were at the crowded SyFy/Entertainment Weekly party, and Tyrese Gibson and other celebs were running around.) Oh, and there are spoilers for the first season of Dollhouse, including the unaired episode “Epitaph One,” which is on the DVD box set.

So Lost waited four years to start giving us “flash forwards,” and even then, they were just jumping a bit ahead, to where some of the castaways got off the island. Dollhouse, meanwhile, gave us an unaired season finale in its very first year, where we jump forward to the bleak, desolate year 2019 and learn what happens to all of our main cast members in the future. And Whedon and friends said on the Dollhouse panel that those post-apocalyptic “flash forwards” will crop up in the new season as well, and that dark future will shape the course of the show this season.

What was Joss thinking, giving us so much, so soon?

Whedon says he was thinking the show was about to be canceled, so why not? Also, the network really wanted one more episode (until they didn’t), and Whedon couldn’t show the unaired pilot because it had been superseded by events:

It literally came from the studio’s need to show another episode… We didn’t have the money to shoot another one. I won’t do a clip show. We can’t show the original pilot because it just doesn’t make sense now. So I said, “Look, what I can do for you is I can probably shoot a horror movie in the Dollhouse with a completely different cast, on video instead of film, in six days, put some flashbacks with our regular cast. The whole thing was basically out of necessity. We had to do it fast and cheap. And the best things I do usually come out of that.

But it’s not as if the post-apocalyptic episode was something Whedon and company pulled out of thin air. Whedon says the logic behind the episode’s bleak storyline was to “see this to its logical conclusion.”

One thing I learned — I learned this on Firefly, too: Don’t save anything for the way back. You just throw everything out there, because you might not be coming back. Now we are, but it’s really helped inform where we’re going this season. Without turning it too dark or anything, it’s really had a lot to do with what we’re doing.

So a lot of people seemed to have a hard time rooting for the Dollhouse, and its amoral entrepreneurs like Adelle DeWitt and computer whiz Topher Brink. And now we know that Adelle and Topher will be responsible for destroying the entire human race, through their experiments into erasing people’s personalities. How do we possibly sympathize with them, or even stand to look at such monsters? Joss says it’s not quite as simple as it appears.

All of them are a lot more textured, and the problem may be a lot bigger than this one place. There’s a storm coming, and the question is where are they going to be, how are they going to react to that, and what are they going to do when that comes? And so I think you’re going to see a lot of virtue in people you didn’t expect it from, and a lot of terrible stuff from the people we love. And that’s why I make TV.

And in the unaired episode "Epitaph One," we get to see a few moments of people making defining choices — including Adelle DeWitt, being confronted with a suit from the Rossum Corp., telling her the Dollhouse has a new business model. Whedon says it's pretty clear from the context that DeWitt isn't on board with Rossum's radical extension of the Dollhouse's concept. But that's just one of the decisions she'll face.

She’s going to have a lot of quandaries, a lot of moral gray area to wade through. In a way, I think she has it harder than anybody, because she really is on the edge between the truly villainous and our heroes, and she’s sympathetic, she’s a human, but she’s the one responsible for most of the terrible decisions. So what happens this year with her is going to be really fun.

(And by “fun,” I suspect Whedon means “gut-wrenching, hilarious, tragic and capable of converting a whole new legion of Olivia Williams fans.”)

But just because we now have a new sense of the future the Dollhouse is moving towards, and the epic arc of history that these characters are taking part in, doesn’t mean we’ll be done with the “assignment of the week” episodes. The Dollhouse still needs clients, and the viewers still need to see something resolved every week, says Whedon. And you can use the “A” stories, about this week’s client or this week’s job, to comment on the characters and contrast them with the long-running “B” stories. Dollhouse will never be totally serialized and feature a new “cool plot twist” every week, with no actual resolution.

So in a sense, every show Joss Whedon has done has been about people searching (or fighting) for an identity in the face of forces that want to take that away. (Like, say, Buffy Summers trying to define herself as an individual instead of what Giles, or the Watchers Council, or the Master’s prophecies, etc., want her to be. Or both River Tam searching for her lost identity, or Mal Reynolds trying to hold onto who he is in the wake of the battle of Serenity.) And now Dollhouse is the darkest, clearest expression of this theme. We sprung this theory on Whedon, and luckily he didn’t laugh at us or fling a drink at us.

But is Dollhouse is the culminating statement of that theme? Or is there another darker, even more shattering story about someone whose identity has been taken away, that Whedon has yet to tell? He says:

I don't think I have ever done a show that was so directly about the search for the self as this one, which is about somebody searching for herself entirely literally. And you know, you'd think eventually I'd find myself and get over it — write about something else — but it fascinates me to no end, and building these characters up, breaking them down… All of the writers, we just spend all our time talking about what this means to us [and] what it means to be a human, and it's something that I love deconstructing. Since I don't have robots, this is the next best thing.

All of which made us wish Joss Whedon would get some robots. But maybe that’s his next show?

And finally, we had to ask Whedon about Cabin In The Woods, the movie he’s done with Cloverfield's Drew Goddard. Is it science fictional, or fantastic in some way? So far, all the descriptions we've come across have made it sound like a deconstruction of slasher movies. But Whedon confirms there's something fantastical in the film — he just won't say what, yet.

As you might have guessed from the posters that came out the other day, Cabin In The Woods is a horror movie commenting on horror movies. And Whedon says Cabin is “very meta. It’s meta-tastic.” And while it’s very different from Scream, it has a similar agenda in the sense that “I love horror movies, and I want to talk about them. Kevin Williamson did that brilliantly. We have a very, very different story to tell. But we are as fascinated by the teenagers who make bad decisions as he is.”

Mac 101: Get a PC printer running on a Mac. There’s a driver for that!

Filed under: , ,

More Mac 101, tips and tricks for new Mac users.

While this tip may be old news to tech-savvy folk, I think it might help a lot of recent Mac switchers who want to leverage their existing investment in their Windows-compatible peripherals.

I have a friend who has been on Windows forever. He finally had his fill, and after some incessant nagging on my part, he made the switch. What I expected to happen, did happen — he’s thrilled being on a Mac. He’s yet to see a crash, and as most of us know, it generally ‘just works.’

He did have one problem though. He had a Dell USB printer sitting on his desk. When he plugged it into his MacBook it wasn’t recognized, and there was a scrolling list of lots of printers, but nothing from Dell.

A quick web search revealed the printer was actually a rebranded Samsung ML-1710. The Samsung driver page for this printer didn’t show any Mac drivers. Searching a bit deeper on Google, we found that an unsupported Mac driver was hiding on the Australian Samsung website.

We downloaded and installed the driver, and what do you know? The printer came up, and printed just fine.

The reality is that there are a lot more printer brands than there are original equipment manufacturers, and it’s pretty easy to find out who actually makes a particular printer. If it’s a USB printer, chances are good you can find a driver and be quickly printing away. For a wide-ranging solution, the Gutenprint (formerly Gimp-Print) open source project provides drivers for hundreds of older or unsupported printers.

The moral: Don’t give up on your PC printer if you feel like it still has life in it; a little bit of online research may turn up a way forward for your Mac. If you have similar happy endings, or unpleasant ones, let us know in the comments. Your fellow readers can learn from your experiences.

TUAWMac 101: Get a PC printer running on a Mac. There’s a driver for that! originally appeared on The Unofficial Apple Weblog (TUAW) on Fri, 31 Jul 2009 18:00:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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Parent Of The Year Arrested After Dragging Kid Through Verizon Store On a Leash [Crime]

Not surprisingly Melissa Catherine Smith-Means of Alabama (oh…Alabama) was arrested a few months ago for this incident in a Verizon store. Who knew someone would have a camera in a cellphone store?

After being arrested she told the police “My young ‘un loves being dragged around on a leash. It’s how I was brought up.” She was also wearing this shirt. Ok, maybe this last part didn't happen—but you can picture it can't you? [LiveLeak via TechEBlog via Gadget Review]

Our Favorite Last Lines From Science Fiction Novels [Last Lines]

Science fiction is the literature of the future. So the best SF novels have endings that resolve the story and leave you feeling as though it continues after the last page. Here are our favorite last lines from SF books.

Last year, we gave you our favorite opening sentences from science fiction novels — but when we decided to do the same thing for endings, it turned out to be harder to find as many great ones, until we did a bit more digging. Why are great endings rarer than great beginnings?

In some ways, a great opening line is easier than a great last line. Everybody understands the need to draw the reader in, to craft a beginning that both seduces and informs the uncommitted. A first line gives you hints of what the story will be about, but also establishes a tone. But a last line has to wrap up the last bits of story, leave you with as much closure as the writer wants you to have, and give a feeling of a final grace note. And a lot of science fiction novels seem to end with a bang, or a last order of business, or a final thought — but a line that wraps things up, storywise, and leaves you with a sense that the story continues, past the horizon? That's a tad rarer.

So we spent hours sitting in various bookstores and our own book collections, rifling through the science fiction books to find the last lines that stay with you after you’ve put the book down. (I sat on the floor of a Border’s for a couple hours. Shudder.) And here’s what we came across, including a few fantasy ones as well. (Special thanks to Alexis Brown, who devoted tons of time to the search for the perfect final note.)

It goes without saying, there may be spoilers here. (Although perhaps not surprisingly, many of the best last lines are the ones which give the least away, because they do the least plot wrangling.) Also, we’re cheating slightly, in some cases, and giving you the last paragraphs of novels, rather than just the last sentence. So here are our favorites:

Philip K. Dick, A Scanner Darkly:

“Stooping Down, Bruce picked one of the stubbled blue plants, then placed it in his right shoe, sliping it down out of sight. A present for my friends, he thought, and looked forward inside his mind, where no one could see, to Thanksgiving.” It’s a lovely surreal ending to a weird, unsettling book, and the blue plant that Bruce puts in his shoe is one of the seedlings of the mysterious drug Substance D. What’s he going to do with it? I love the fact that in a novel about surveillance and fractured personas we have to be told, at the last, that nobody can see inside Bruce’s mind.

Matthew De Abaitua, Red Men:

"She moved on to the question of what she would dream about, if she could decide on a good dream before going to sleep, and if the dream would obey her wishes and stay good all through the night." Another novel about fractured psyches and surveillance and people confronting their dark side, and it ends with a child's wish to control her own dreams — and we linger on how simple, and yet how difficult, that actually is.

Iain M. Banks, Against A Dark Background:

“A little later the monowheel vehicle spun backward out of the sewer outfall, pirrouetted vertically like a saluting mount, swung down across the greasy slope of stones at the base of the House’s walls, dodged uncoordinated gunfire from a nearby tower, and accelerated quickly across the tide-flooding sands.” Jesus. Read that aloud. It’s a poem. And the imagery is so vivid, you can see the monowheel’s dance, in your head. It’s epic.

Neil Gaiman, Neverwhere:

“And they walked away together through the hole in the wall, back into the darkness, leaving nothing behind them; even the doorway.” It’s interesting how many of these last lines are a literal departure, into darkness or into the void. Anyway, it’s a really haunting last sentence.

William Barton, When Heaven Fell:

“Then the pipers piped and the drummers drummed and we all marched away into the sky.” The main character is fighting in the alien army that conquered the human race, and they finally may have found an even more powerful enemy to go fight. I just love the ring of “marched away into the sky.” Why isn’t William Barton worshiped as a god, again?

Mary Doria Russell, The Sparrow:

“Unaware of his own movement, schooled by old habit, Vincenzo Giuliani rose and went to the windows, and stood looking, for how long he had no idea, across a grassy open courtyard to a complex panorama of medieval masonry and jumbled rock, formal garden and gnarled trees: a scene of great and beautiful antiquity.” It’s a wonderfully melancholy last sentence for a novel that ends with dreadful sadness and contemplation of almost unimaginable brutality. The universe is even older, and even harsher, than anything we have on Earth, and yet there’s beauty as well.

William Gibson, Pattern Recognition:

“She kisses him back and he falls asleep.” Supposedly it’s a major taboo to begin a novel with a character waking up, but in this case, ending a novel with falling asleep, especially after a kiss, just feels right.

Cory Doctorow, Little Brother:

“She kissed me then, and I kissed her back, and it was some time before we went out for that burrito.” It’s like the end of a Roger Moore James Bond movie, where he’s finally in bed with the main girl, and we pan back slowly, giving them some privacy for their much-deserved nookie. Except Doctorow’s version is funnier, and the burrito thing is a nice callback to the crucial burrito scene earlier in the book.

The Killing of Worlds (Succession, Book 2) by Scott Westerfield:

“A kiss could change the world.” Another kiss, and this one full of hope that the personal can have a transforming effect on the universe.

Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451:

“When we reach the city.” Super short, but one of the most discussed last lines in literature, for its possible religious symbolism among other things. It’s inspired a whole blog.

Charles Stross, Saturn’s Children:

“And none of them need fear being eaten by memories of Rhea.” I just love the “eaten by memories” thing.

Brian Francis Slattery, Liberation:

“The Vibe doesn’t say a word, for it’s been done with him for years; but in his daughter’s breathings, the thickening sky talking about the rain, the insects landing w/ nuts in the road that connect La Paz with his wife sleeping on the warping porch at the edge of the ravine, he thinks he hears the answer.” One last rolling boulder of a sentence from this thundering novel, that leaves you wondering just what that answer might be.

Larry Niven and Edward M Lerner, Juggler of Worlds:

“In the skies over Atlantis, two suns were gone.” And if that doesn’t leave an image in your mind after you close the book, there’s no helping you.

Frank Herbert, Dune:

"Think on it, Chani: the princess will have the name, yet she'll live as less than a concubine-never to know the moment of tenderness from the man to whom she's bound. While we, Chai, we who carry the name of the concubine-history will call us wives." Both Alexis and I picked this one out separately — it's just such a great chunk of intrigue. Although I was torn between this one and Children of Dune, which ends with another great quote: “One of us had to accept the agony, and he was always the strongest.”

The Prefect, Alastair Reynolds:

“Dreams,” Demikhov said. “Beautiful human dreams.” It’s actually really hard to end a novel on a line of dialogue without feeling hokey or as though the interplay of dialogue and narration is just stopping, but Reynolds does it amazingly well.

Madeleine L’Engle, A Wrinkle in Time:

“But they never learned what it was that Mrs. Whatsit, Mrs Who, and Mrs Which had to do, for there was a gust of wind, and they were gone.” It’s just so fairytale-like, with the nice use of “for” and the gust of wind. And the mystery lingering after you close the back cover.

Suzanne Collins, The Hunger Games:

“I take his hand, holding tightly, preparing for the cameras, and dreading the moment when I will finally have to let go.” One of our favorite books of the past year, and it ends with the greatest test yet to begin. And “let go” has so many different meanings here, it’s amazing.

Margaret Atwood, Oryx And Crake:

“Zero Hour, Snowman thinks. Time to go.” You can see why this book is getting a sequel, since that’s another ending that feels like a beginning.

Arthur C Clake, Childhood’s End:

“No one dared disturb him or interrupt his thoughts; and presently he turned his back upon the dwindling sun.” Another one that both Alexis and I picked out separately, for its image of the sun dying away.

Roger Zelazny, The Guns of Avalon:

“We moved on through the cavern to the stairs where the dead men lay and went round and round above him in the dark.” Another one which ends with a sense of motion and departure, with the narrator leaving into the dark.

Otherland Volume Three: Mountain of Black Glass by Tad Williams:

“She learned on the balcony railing, waiting for the end of the world.” There are some last lines that would also make great first lines, and this is definitely one of them.

H.G. Wells, War Of The Worlds:

“And strangest of all is it to hold my wife’s hand again, and to think that I have counted her, and that she has counted me, among the dead.” It makes me want to go back and re-read that book right now.

George Orwell, 1984:

“He loved Big Brother.” You can’t get much sharper, darker, or bleaker than that final statement.

Mary Shelley, Frankenstein:

“He was soon borne away by the waves and lost in darkness and distance.” Another last line that’s a departure, and that features someone disappearing into the darkness, in a poetic, haunting way.

Vernor Vinge, Rainbow’s End:

“Then he was down the elevator and back on the sunny plaza. And hovering immanent all around him were the worlds of art and science that humankind was busy building. What if I can have it all?” Of all the endings we looked through, this is the one that felt the most cinematic, for some reason. You can just feel the camera panning back to show the future being built and the big question hovering in the air.

Austin Grossman, Soon I Will Be Invincible:

"When your laboratory explodes, lacing your body with a super-charged elixir, what do you do? You don't just lie there. You crawl out of the rubble, hideously scarred, and swear vengeance on the world. You keep going. You keep trying to take over the world." More books should suddenly veer into second person, as if this is all of us going on this journey of vengeance together — it just amps up the awful power of that last evil oath.

Ken MacLeod, The Sky Road:

“Whatever the truth about the Deliverer, she will remain in my mind as she was shown on that statue, and all the other statues and murals, songs and stories: riding, at the head of her own swift cavalry, with a growing migration behind her and a decadent, vulnerable, defenceless and rich continent ahead; and, floating bravely above her head and above her army, the black flag on which nothing is written.” The image of conquest, culminating with the blank, black flag, is just so rich and hangs around long after you put the book down.

Suzette Haden Elgin, Native Tongue:

“One of the things he planned to do, before he left this fancy hell, was figure out how to get into the Interface and go for a swim with those whales in that beautiful blue water. Round and round and round, in a lovely endless loop.” Another really sticky image, this one a bit surreal and full of color.

Top image is cover of The Sky Road by Ken MacLeod, art by Mark Salwowski. Additional reporting by Alexis Brown.

Because I love you.

Got this e-mail just now which said, simply, “Holyshitfuckdamnballsawesome!” Well, I had to go to that link, right??

Thanks, Rima! (As she said: “That’s right. Nazi dwarfs with whips. You’re welcome.”) And thank you, Bookdwarf!

p.s. lost my ‘berry job. Am not feelin‘ the funneh. Will try to persist for the sake of you, my beautiful fans! I love you guys!!!

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